Kill the Batman.

Now on to my list, which was much harder to compile than I expected.  In no particular order…

2001 A Space Odyssey. I don’t think any film has ever captured my imagination like this film had.  I kind of stumbled into it as a clueless adolescent.  At the time, I knew nothing of Stanley Kubrick and I knew nothing of this iconic masterpiece.  Instead, I stumbled across Arthur C. Clarke’s companion novel (written concurrently as the film was in production) in the school library.  It was an old well-worn edition and I remember being transfixed by the first few chapters.  Finishing the book, and sharing my excitement with my parents, they immediately pointed my toward the film.  Coming across an ancient (well-played) VHS copy, I sat down late at night to watch it… and my mind was blown away.  Stanley Kubrick was a genius.  I’ve been hooked on film, and story telling in general, ever since.

Children of Men. I walked into this film with zero expectations.  It was a matinee show just after the holidays.  I figured it was sci-fi and post-apocalyptic.. and that should be enough to entertain me for a few hours.  Wow.  This movie is incredible.  Without a doubt the most intense scenes I have ever seen.  A technical marvel: the shot lengths, the production design, the writing… they blew my mind.  Alfonso Cuaron, the director, is brilliant… and not just because he fully emulated Stanley Kubrick — in fact, Children of Men straight up feels like a Kubrick movie.  Okay, well, maybe that is why he’s brilliant.   Nevertheless, I look forward to more of his work.

Godfather Part 2. It’s really hard for me to pick between the first two Godfather films.  Both are extraordinary.  For the sake of this list, I lean more toward Part 2… if only because so many of the storylines planted in the first film pay off so nicely in the second.  Coppola’s direction is phenomenal and the cast is unreal… Pacino, DeNiro, Keaton.  The scene where Michael slaps Kay… ah!  The scene where (spoiler alert!) Fredo is “taken care of”… Michael’s reaction to the gunshot echoing across the lake… heartbreaking.  Ah!  So freaking good!

Raiders of the Lost Ark. Hands down, the best action movie ever.  no “macgruffin” in the history of film has completely overshadowed its main character, especially a character as iconic and legendary as Indiana Jones.… a problem severely evident in each of the sequels.  This film’s scale is so epic, so biblical, there are few movies quite like it.  To be honest, I love the Easter holiday because every year the networks air The Ten Commandments… the ultimate prequel to Raiders of the Lost Ark. Just as Bollock says in the film: “we are simply passing through history  This.  This is history” the viewer comes away feeling the same way.  This, this film, is history.    Steven Speilberg, love him or hate him, HAD talent, this movie is proof.  And, once upon a time, George Lucas KNEW how to capture an audience’s imagination.  Oh man, this movie, without question, has one of the best endings ever… I mean, come on, God kills the Nazis.  Divine intervention at it’s finest.  And then the warehouse scene… nothing will ever match it… I wish Spielberg and Lucas would just stop trying already.

Back to the Future. This seems to be the most lighthearted film on my list and certainly the only comedy (though is it truly a comedy?)  Back to the Future is a fantastic movie… one most people don’t appreciate. Sure it’s Michael J. Fox.  Sure it’s classic ‘80s pop culture.  But have you ever realized how well written this film is?  The structure, the pacing, are fantastic. The characters are so well written and so well performed you feel as though they’re old friends.  Robert Zemeckis will always hold a special place in my heart because of this film… even if he has made nothing but crap since (yes, Forrest Gump now falls into my ‘crap’ pile… though probably unjustly.)  Seriously though, when is the last time you went to the movies and had as much as fun as the first time you saw BTTF?  That’s what I thought.

The Shining. Kubrick again, go figure.  If Back to the Future is my favorite comedy, this is, obviously, my favorite horror film.  Again, Kubrick shows he’s a master of pacing, of nuance.  And Nicholson plays the role so well that, in my mind, this may be his best performance (only because his over acting so fits the character.) If I ever go homicidal, I hope it’s a lot like this movie… and I end up freezing to death in a garden maze.  At least once in my life I’d like to chop down a door like that… ha.  I’m joking… maybe…

Superman.  The superhero movie of my childhood.  I actually have memories of watching this movie (actually, it was Superman 2) thinking it was a news broadcast and that the fight between Superman and the Kryptonians was actually happening downtown.  Ha.  What a world we live in as children.  And imagine my surprise as I grew up to realize that Superman The Movie is a shockingly good film.  At a time when superheroes were nothing more than campy parodies, the filmmakers (my beloved Richard Donner) reinvented the genre.  The movie is epic, sweeping, and, when you consider that Lois Lane does in fact die – only to upset Superman so much that he TURNS BACK TIME, awesome.  I still get chills when Superman catches Lois in his arms (“You’ve got me?!  Whose got you?!”)… and then the helicopter.  Name me one superhero introduction in a movie as cool as that.

King King. I’m talking about the RKO original… not Peter Jackson’s travesty (even the Jeff Bridges remake in the 70s was more enjoyable than that.)  Yes, sir.  King Kong takes me back, way back.  My mom use to work for Carnegie Mellon University and it seems I was often brought along, thrown in a conference room, and left in front of a TV and VCR (that was some serious technology back them) with King King playing.  Kong was the best babysitter I ever had.  This movie is a classic among classics.  You can look at it as deep as you want… is King Kong another victim of capitalism?  Or is he just a giant ape swatting at bi-planes?  Either way, it’s awesome.

Vanishing Point. Now this is trippy, psychedelic cinema at it’s finest.  Some people may find this film unwatchable… but, for me, the mixture of ’70s muscle car, ’70s drug use, ‘70s music, and ‘70s cinematography and editing is glorious.  The dude needs to get from Denver to San Fran in 15 hours.  Why?  It doesn’t matter.  Just give the guy some speed and here we go…

The Dark Knight. The superhero movie of my adulthood.  I was looking forward to this movie for years… but I’ll be honest, I was half expecting a bust.  I mean, just a few summers removed from Superman Returns, TDK had all the signs of a colossal letdown.  The trailers kicked ass… but it was just too good to be true, right?  I guess sometimes dreams do come true… and as a life-long Batman fan this adaptation was literally that: a dream come true.

And there you have it.  My top ten… at the moment.  I should hurry up and publish this before I start changing my mind…

- cK

http://www.downdirtyword.com/fictionpage.html

I'm droppin' the hammer!

And what’s so awesome about the ’79 Daytona 500 that I just had to write about it?!  To be as brief as possible, I will sum it up like this: before the ’79 Daytona 500 nobody really gave a sh*t nor knew that much about (unless you lived in the south) stock car racing.  After the ’79 Daytona 500, every sports fan in America could tell you what NASCAR was.  It literally put the sport on the map.

Rubbin's racing.

So what was so special about this race?  Plenty.  But first I have to point out two very important facts: 1. This was the first Daytona 500 televised live.  2.  That same weekend, most of the country had been hammered by a devastating blizzard (we know what that’s like) leaving millions of Americans with nothing better to do or watch than a bunch of guys drive around an oval track…

Hit the pace car? Hit the pace car!

Obviously, they saw something pretty awesome, even by today’s standards.  I’m just going to let Ryan McGee of ESPN The Magazine paint you the picture…

Feb. 18, 1979. The Great American Race is being televised live flag-to-flag for the first time. It’s a rainy, sloppy day in Florida while most of the East Coast is sacked by snowstorms. Cale Yarborough and Donnie Allison pound on each other’s cars running 1-2 on the final lap. Big wreck in Turn 3. Richard Petty sweeps by to win his sixth Daytona 500. Bobby Allison stops on the cool-down to check and see if brother Donnie is OK. Two drivers commence beating the hell out of each other live on CBS Sports. Millions of people without anything else to watch one month after football and two months before baseball fall in love with NASCAR.

And you for those of you that can’t read (figures you’re on my blog), you can see the crazy-as-hell final lap here….

Some of you might still be wondering why this topic interests me.  Well, the answer lies in the details.  Did anybody notice what kind of car they’re driving?  Well, I will tell you…. It’s a 1977 Cutlass S 442 (the old slant-nose.  Can you believe that was considered aerodynamic back then?  Lol – like a chiseled brick.)  And here’s a little confession… I’ve been putting some thought into getting her out on the streets again… something has to be done… we will see…

Spidey-Reboot!

Now, if you’ve been living under a rock the last few days you might have missed the slight, though well PRed, falling out between Sam Rami, the acclaimed director of the first three Spiderman films, and Sony Pictures, the studio that owns the rights.  According to those very same rumors, the studio wanted a plethora of villains and Rami just wouldn’t budge (having already cast John Malkovich as the Vulture.)  I guess that makes this a classic case of “creative difference” in which one of the parties tells the other to “f*ck off.”

Sam Rami: Spiderman's man no more.

For some, Rami’s departure came as good news.  Spiderman 3 is one of the worst movies ever made (Exhibit A.) And that’s not opinion either… it’s written in stone high atop Mount Arafat (the astronauts told me so.)  But, on the other hand, I enjoyed Spiderman 1 and 2. Though, if you know of my love of Richard Donner’s original Superman movies you know why… Rami just about ripped off every plot point he could from those two movies.  Never the less, it needs to be said again… Spiderman 3 was one of the worst movies ever made (Exhibit B.)  So what went wrong?  Rami claims the studio made him (surprise-surprise) put in way too many villains.  And the fact that he’s walked away from the franchise because they were doing it again kind of makes me believe him (that doesn’t mean I forgive him.)

Marc Webb: I can't believe I actually found a pic of this guy!

What about Marc Webb you ask?   Do I approve or disapprove of this hire?!  To be honest, this is a real head scratcher.  500 Days of Summer was a cute, semi-original love story.  It wasn’t particularly entertaining.   It wasn’t particularly creative.  It was just about everything I expect from a first time director such as Marc Webb.  But to give this guy the helm of Sony’s biggest movie property in hopes of creating another successful movie trilogy (still in the shadow of the colossal originals) seems INSANE.

But maybe Sony knows what they’re doing.  I thought hiring Rami was INSANE.  Darkman really left, and still leaves, a bad taste in my mouth.  But the man pulled it off… and is now one of the industry’s biggest names.  As for Webb, I’m guessing he gave the studio one-hell-of-a passionate, inspired pitch… and that’s what they’re buying into.  That and he’s young, cheap, and will do whatever the hell they want (expect lots of villains.)  I guess, just as with Rami’s hiring, it’s probably best to take a wait-and-see approach to this.  But, then again, look how that turned out with Ang Lee’s Hulk… I still want my money back.

Tobey Maguire: too old for school!

Oh – one last thing.  Sorry Tobey Maguire fans.  He’s done.  Expect a new, and much younger, leading man to be cast… and, with a 2012 release date fast approaching, expect it soon!

Three's Company

We also have our first look at Adrian Brody all set to kick ass…

I’m still not so sure how I feel about his casting (you can read my original thoughts on the topic here.)  I will admit, however, that they could have done far worse…. like Channing Tatum or something.  So, until we get a teaser trailer and start seeing some footage, I will remain content.  As for the rest of the pictures…. they look cool enough.  Seem to have the feel of  Predator 2 so I’m cool with that…

See more, read more here: http://io9.com/5449915/meet-your-new-predators

Anyway, like I said above, if I was a filmmaker with piles of studio money to do anything I want with, I’d probably be a lot like James Cameron.  Case in point: just this week, Cameron secured the rights to the soon-to-be released nonfiction book The Last Train From Hiroshima: The Survivors Look Back by Charles Pellegrino.  The book is the story of Tsutomu Yamaguchi who some of you may of seen the news recently as he just passed away.  And why would Cameron be interested in making a movie based on Tsutomu Yamaguchi?  Because Yamaguchi is the only man to have survived not one atomic explosion (Hiroshima) but two (Nagasaki.)  Yes.  You read that right.  This man survived BOTH atomic bombings.

It’s an insane but true story, one that I’ve been aware of for a few years now.  A resident of Nagasaki, Yamaguchi had been in Hiroshima on business for a few months.  On August 6^th he was preparing to leave the city and return home… but that morning, the Enola Gay dropped her payload.  Just kilometers from the blast’s epicenter, Yamaguchi suffered extreme injuries (ruptured eardrums, temporary blindness, severe burns) but still managed to return home to Nagasaki the next day (the dude was tough.) On August 9^th, he returned to work (the dude was seriously tough) and while explaining to his supervisor what had happened to him in Hiroshima just a few days earlier, guess what happened… the second bomb dropped.  Again just a few kilometers from the blast’s epicenter, Yamaguchi was miraculously unharmed (or additionally harmed) by the explosion.

Understandably, Yamaguchi went on to become quite the proponent of nuclear disarmament and, before he passed away, had met with Cameron to discuss the possibility of a film about nuclear weapons (a topic I find fascinating.)  Of their meeting, Yamaguchi stated: “I think it’s Cameron’s and Pellegrino’s (the author) destiny to make a film about nuclear weapons.”

How intriguing is that?  Now, as much as I loved Avatar, I hope Cameron doesn’t go all Titanic with it and spend the next decade of his life on the franchise (he’s already declared a sequel – actually a trilogy – is in the works.)  Instead, I want him to move on with his career and make this movie.  Now, there is speculation that Cameron bought the film rights with plans to make a documentary or, perhaps, hand off to another director (I vote for Alfonso Cuaron!) so we’ll just have to wait and see.

As more news trickles out on this, I’ll be sure to pass it along – and when the book comes out later this month there’s a good chance I’ll pick it up – expect a review!

Kevin Costner he is not.

News first leaked about this film almost two years ago with the lofty sale of a spec script called Sheriff of Nottingham.  According to the trades, the story followed a more sympathetic Sheriff and, one can only assume, a more antagonistic Robin Hood.  It wasn’t long before Russell Crowe became attached (starring as both the Sherriff of Nottingham and Robin Hood  — though it should be noted that the two characters might have been combined in early drafts) followed soon after by director Ridley Scott.  So, yes, this is the same dynamic duo that brought us Gladiator.  Hurray!  But, seriously people, do you really care to see another interpretation of Robin Hood?  And from what I’ve heard, numerous script rewrites have made this story much more loyal to the Robin Hood tales of the past (Robin Hood =good; Sheriff = bad.)

I, for one, have never been a big fan of Gladiator, nor Russell Crowe, nor Ridley Scott.  But Gladiator was a huge hit.   It made lots of money and it won many awards.  So it’s only natural, a decade later, for everyone to go into hysterics over the artists working together again… and with more gritty violence, no less.

Before I go any further, you should probably watch the trailer:

The typical reaction, from those that I questioned, seems to go like this: “Russell Crowe?  Ridley Scott?  This looks like a sequel to Gladiator?! That would be awesome… wait…. Robin Hood? Are you f*cking serious?” You see, the trailer really does look like a sequel to Gladiator.  It sounds like Gladiator.  It’s shot like Gladiator.  It’s violent like Gladiator.  And, not having a hit in some time, both Crowe and Scott would probably love to make a sequel to Gladiator… if only Maximus hadn’t died.  So, in my opinion, it seems Crowe and Scott did the next best thing… remake Gladiator.  And, hell, Robin Hood’s a character everybody knows… why not make a violent and gritty Robin Hood movie?!

So that’s what we’re getting.  That’s what I see in this trailer… comically so.  Watch the trailer again… does it feel like a SNL parody of Gladiator to anybody else?  Everybody knows the story of Robin Hood. Every decade since the beginning of cinema there have been numerous interpretations of the character.   So, taking such a watered down, over saturated character and throwing him into an ultra-gritty, ultra-violent movie just seems laughable.  It’s like First Blood with Big Bird.

But I could be wrong.  Perhaps Robin Hood will be a display of true originality.  Perhaps this character will be explored in ways nobody thought possible.  I guess we’ll just have to wait and see…

You are entering the territory of Robin Hood and his Merry Men.

And Happy Holidays!!!  -cK

Good or Bad?! I must know!!!

AVATAR:

It is not that Avatar is a poorly made “bad” film. It might even be that it is the exact opposite. This film comes across to viewers as the kind of high gloss, meticulously planned project we have come to expect from the stable of formerly great directors that used to dazzle us in yesteryears. James Cameron, I would like you to meet Spielberg and Lucas who will be your roommates from now on. They could do a sitcom, it would be hilarious.

Avatar is too slick, too “good,” and it comes out the other end as technically and technologically competent, but severely lacking in places like dialogue, plot construction, and basic human feeling. Was I supposed to care about those cartoon blue creatures? And no they did not look like real people like so many reviews have said. The 3D looked better in the human scenes than it did in the Na’vi scenes because on Pandora everything looks like so many digital cartoons being produced today. There is a sensor on the 3D glasses you get that if you touch it the 3D effect disappears. I couldn’t stop touching it out of sheer boredom. This film is way too long and way too predictable.

Specifically, this film is too neat of a package. When a character says an “offhanded” line in the beginning of the film you know beyond a shadow of a doubt it will be really important in the end. It’s like Cameron couldn’t stop reading the foreshadowing section of his Screenwriting 101 book. The cheesiness of some of the elements in this film know’s no bounds either. Did you really just name the all important reason to attack the Na’vi “Unobtainium”? Honestly, that’s your best shot? It feels like Cameron wrote that as a placeholder early in the construction of this film and forgot to change it by the end. Ridiculous. Why don’t you just shoot Indiana Jones thousands of feet in the air in a metal refrigerator only to suffer minor injuries. Same thing.

Cameron spends most of Avatar ripping off other films (Dances With Wolves), himself (“loaders” from Aliens) and Earth’s biological world (Pandora animals that are dog, horse, and lemur equivalent) only to end up with a film that can only be described as unoriginal and above all hollow. I think that might be the best way to describe it. All surface, no substance. Hurry up and get to the kitchen Cameron, I think Lucas and Spielberg are eating all of your peanut butter.

by Ryan Lizardi

—

Ryan Lizardi is a Ph.D. Candidate in Mass Communications at Penn State.  He’s also my very first guest-blogger and, because of it, will always hold a special place in my heart (that and we went to film school together.)  Hopefully I will be able to con him into writing more film reviews in the future!!

- cK

And if you’ve seen Avatar, and you loved it, or hated it, let’s hear it…

]]> http://klockworkkugler.com/2009/12/23/avatar_lizardi-reviews/feed/ 3 cklockwork http://klockworkkugler.com/2009/12/17/avatar_i-see-you/ http://klockworkkugler.com/2009/12/17/avatar_i-see-you/#comments Thu, 17 Dec 2009 14:50:04 +0000 cklockwork http://klockworkkugler.com/?p=379 ]]>

This is a nightmare.

I know I just said I wasn’t going to comment anymore on Avatar until I had actually seen the movie… but the official music video for I See You has been released and, with apologies to any Leona Lewis fans reading this, it is so f*cking bad.  I know I already thoroughly bashed the song here but watching the “official” video… it’s actually sort of insulting, like we’re idiots.  This really makes me want to not see the movie — or any movie ever again.  But then I’d feel like I was letting you down.  I don’t want to let you down.  I’ll see this damn movie.

Watch the “official music video” for yourself…

"Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs..."

I know this is the week of James Cameron’s Avatar and I know you’re probably expecting me to shoot off a few more posts about it (and that crappy marketing campaign.) But I really think there is nothing more to say about that film… without actually seeing it. So, in honor of that other J.C. whose birthday most of us will be celebrating, one way or another, sometime next week, I’ve decided to compile a list of my favorite holiday movies. I don’t think there’s an order to these…

Die Hard. Just watched it last night… This classic stars Bruce Willis and Alan Rickman and – unquestionably — kicks ass. If you haven’t seen it… well, I don’t know why you’re reading this blog. And yes: it is a Christmas movie. The terrorist take over the building on Christmas Eve… and only two people can save the day: Jesus Christ himself (but I guess he’s off doing other things) or John McClane, a NYPD detective who just so happens to be visiting his estranged wife that very night, in that exact building. Awesomeness ensues. Contrary to what some people think (mainly a confused coworker of mine who once told me Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was a good movie – if you’re reading this, dude, you owe me the ten bucks I spent on that dvd) the movie has held up rather well over time. Sure it has the look and feel of mid-80s cinema… but is that so wrong? If you think about the film as a period piece, it’s completely acceptable.

Favorite scene: When McClane sends the dead-baddie down in the elevator with the note written on his chest: “Now I have a machine gun. Ho-Ho-Ho.” (see it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KShj0gPAH0g . Why the little shit has the embed option disabled is beyond me… but I’m over it.) Though the scene where he throws the C-4 plastic explosive down the elevator shaft is pretty awesome as well.

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. This classic stars Chevy Chase and has to be the funniest, legitimate Christmas movie, at least that I can think of. The story is simple, the Griswolds celebrate Christmas, but the laughs are many. I actually haven’t seen this movie in years but I feel it probably holds up rather well. If the film has a downside its that it makes you miss Chevy Chase… what the hell happened to his career?!

Favorite Scene: When the SWAT team storms the house… all to the tune of Here Comes Santa Claus by Gene Autry. Haha. Love it.

Gremlins. Another non-traditional but totally Christmas-based classic. Steven Spielberg produced, Chris Columbus written, and Joe Dante directed, this film hits the spot. It’s comedy. It’s horror. It teaches kids how to responsibly own animals. If this film has a downside… it’s that I now hate each of the filmmakers listed above – Spielberg: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull; Columbus: Bicentennial Man; Dante: Gremlins 2 (he frustrates me to the most. I loved Innerspace!)

Favorite Scene: Phoebe Cates (the hot) explains how she found out there was no Santa Claus. The story is completely random, it rambles on, and it ends up having one of the best dark comedy punch lines ever. Brilliant.

Scrooged. This classic (in my mind at least) stars Bill Murray, is directed by Richard Donner (who also directed Lethal Weapon, another Christmas classic close to being on this list), and is a simple retelling of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. Hmm.  Seems as though the ‘80s were full of dark comedy Christmas movies, a genre that seems to have entirely disappeared. Anyway, in Scrooged you have classic Bill Murray, the biggest, most sarcastic ass of them all. What more do you need?

Favorite Scene: The part where Bill Murray… does something… funny…. Ah, hell. I don’t know. Here’s a clip from Elf instead:

So, what have I forgotten?  Let’s hear it…