PREDATORS_the teaser trailer
So Hack Riven called me out… I haven’t posted in a while. I’ll spare you the excuses, instead I’ll write about a topic I’ve posted about a few times before (here, here, and here.) That topic is Predators. The teaser trailer hit the interwebs earlier this week and it’s amazing I’ve kept my mouth shut about it until now especially considering this is one of few movies I’m looking forward to (and by “looking forward to” I mean nitpicking everything about the movie until it’s release… whereupon I probably won’t even go see it. Ha!) Anyway, here’s the trailer…
So, I’ve watched the trailer twice. The first time I was quite distracted and I didn’t even bother turning off the music playing on I-tunes… but I thought it looked promising. I just watched it again now and… sigh. Suddenly this movie looks a little too much like a remake to me. I mean, they’re really going back to the source material (the 1986 classic staring Arnold Schwarzenegger) which is cool… but I was hoping for more. The trailer does do one thing successfully… it leaves me asking questions. Unfortunately they’re not the type of questions a trailer should leave me with. Instead of leaving my mind swimming in a sea of possible plot ideas and potential I’m left wondering why the heck has this movie been made and who the hell is making it. Let me sum these questions up…
1. Why has this movie been made? The first film was a hit, obviously. You had Schwarzenegger being hunted by an alien. A simple story that was simple entertainment (but damn good simple entertainment.) The film was followed up by Predator 2 (staring heartthrob Danny Glover. Yes, that’s sarcasm.) Except for a few moments here and there that movie was terrible. Don’t get me wrong, I like it, but it really didn’t do the franchise justice. Eventually the 2000s came along and Hollywood finally decided to jump on the brilliant idea (of Dark Horse Comics) to combine both the Alien and Predator franchises. Unfortunately the opportunity for cinematic gold was completely squandered… not once… but twice. AvP and AvP2 tanked… and rightfully so. They were b-movies at their best, both directed by hack directors, and about as memorable as… I don’t know… umm… Stealth. So, by all accounts, it was pretty safe to say that this franchise (along with the Alien franchise) was dead. And then this movie popped up!
2. Who the hell is Nimrod Antal? He’s the director. No, I haven’t heard of him either. But I have the power of the internet so I looked him up on imdb. I see he’s directed a few movies… one of them is called Armored… another Vacancy. No, I haven’t seen them either. I haven’t even heard of them. So I looked them up on youtube and… why the hell haven’t I heard about these movies? They look awesome! So… okay… Predators suddenly has a lot more going for it…
3. Am I the only one who really doesn’t care for Robert Rodriguez? I know, I know, he’s every film student’s hero… but why? El Mariachi was impressive but… it really wasn’t that good. And he hasn’t really made anything good since (unless you count Spy Kids… but I don’t.) Desperado… eh. From Dusk till Dawn… terrible. Planet Terror… barf. Spy Kids…. Spy Kids 2… wasn’t there a third as well?! Sigh. Luckily he’s only producing this film. Perhaps that’s where he belongs. I’m not saying I don’t respect the man… Anyway, he wrote a script for Predators 3 way back in the late ‘90s. But that project got shelved in favor of the AvP series. Now that those have run their course the studios dusted off the old Predator 3 script, brought Rodriguez in to produce, and that’s what we got today. So… I’m not sure what to make of it. He wrote the script… it could be terrible. After all, it didn’t get made back in the ‘90s for a reason.
I guess we’ll just wait and see…
Klockwork Kugler: This is my blog. This is what I do. 
1. I saw the trailer for “Predators” and immediately thought: Adrien Brody? Really? This is the same guy who wore feathers in “The Village” and appeared in a not very good commercial for Diet Coke.
2. I haven’t seen “Vacancy” but, by all accounts, it’s terrible.
3. I saw “From Dusk Till Dawn” when it first came out. Admittedly, it’s not as good as Tarantino’s other films (at that time, “Pulp Fiction” was my main point of reference), but I recall liking it. It struck me has having a more linear storyline compared to “Pulp Fiction,” which brought the story full circle. My thought at the time (and I don’t know if it’s correct) was that Tarantino wrote the script for “From Dusk Till Dawn” early on, but couldn’t get it made until after he had success with “Reservoir Dogs” and “Pulp Fiction.” Whatever the case, Tarantino must have thought Rodriguez did OK with it because the two have worked on other projects together.
ohhhhh, so now you are giving the Hollywood version of El Mariachi an “eh” rating?!?! you know Desperado is one of my all-time favorites. somehow, it manages to balance the over-the-top heroics with a vengeance-driven storyline and yet you don’t mind that. putting any of my attempted rationale aside, who doesn’t want to see a has-been guitarist turned amateur gunslinger played by Antonio Banderas teaming-up with Steve Buscemi who seeks revenge on his big-fish/tiny town, Mexican, drug-lord brother via a guitar case full of weapons, [inhale] THUS simultaneously saving the luscious, library-owning Selma Hayek and freeing a tiny pueblo town while killing dozens of colorful obstacles wonderfully played by the likes of Cheech Marin and the legendary Danny Trejo (oh, who just happens to be a knife-throwing, hired-assassin. yeah!) all with a dash of quality, dark humor. seriously, pitch that to any studio and you automatically get a budget. it’s G-O-L-D-!
…and you’re forgetting Sin City.